Where is The Jaunty Scamp?

"Seriously. Where the fuck is he?"

I was occupied. My bad. I apologize profusely to the two readers that read this regularly.


Meanwhile, may I introduce you to Bad As Hell Clothing that has this shirt of Mack the Knife, who has such teeth dear, and it shows them pearly white...

Monies: US$17

What I Got - Art in the Age of Mechanical Reproduction

Let's rap about Art in the Age of Mechanical Reproduction (AAMR).


The Philadelphia store takes its namesake from German cultural critic Walter Benjamin's essay title. If you happen to be forced to take art criticism as a minor (like me), you'll know that Benjamin is concern with how mass reproduction could affect the "aura" of the art.

For example, is seeing a picture of the Mona Lisa the same as seeing the real McCoy in the Lourve? Do you still get the same experience? Does copying art change its "artfulness?"

So this was what I got, which I gathered, someone else out there already has.

They probably have the same press kits that I have...

... which contained the same CD of their catalogs or the same press releases or the same artists portfolio of Alex Lukas or Thom Lessner, whose shirt that I'll get into in a minute.


The only thing that was individualized was this lovely card addressed to me though someone did point out to me that the letters of GyroWorldWide (the marketing geniuses behind AAMR) logo is an anagram for ORGY. Sure I could have come up with ROY G. but that wouldn't be funny.

Where was I? Oh, yeah. The shirt.


This is it.

Some of you might be wondering what's the deal with the Rod Stewart tranny? Well, ignoramus, prepare to be schooled. This is an amalgamation of Patrick Nagel and Diamond Dave. It's Lessner's tribute to the 80's. Sure, I might get puzzled stares from the public eye and some might wrongly attribute the person to Axel Rose or a fat [insert any hair metal musician] but that doesn't take away the specialness of the shirt.


What I found weird was the tags of the shirt. You have the AAMR tag sewn onto an American Apparel shirt with the tag still attached... it doesn't seem to mesh. One of them needs to go.

In conclusion, I love the shirt design. Lessner makes pretty cool shit. And you can see from the rest of AAMR's lineup, that the artistic creativity is being pushed to new boundaries. I mean, have you not seen this and not want to punch a hole into space and time and just retrieve the shirt for your ownself?

Not only is AAMR prudent in who they get to design the shirts, they're also professional in terms of getting their name out. The press kit that I got from them tells me that they know what they're doing, it tells you that they're cool to do business with.

And in a time where t-shirt sites are a dime and a dozen, Art in the Age of Mechanical Reproduction is one of the few sites that manages to retain its "aura."

A Warm, Stiff Upper-Lip

I want to abstain from cracking wise about mustaches and free rides (snigger) so, instead, I'll post about Mustache and Friends doing the unthinkable by verving from their mustache-themed lineup by having 80s Eddie, designed by Derek Deal, for a presale.

Man, was the eighties as horrible as I imagined it to be?

Monies: US$20 (pre-sale) US$25 (normal sale)

Go, Team Venture!

I'm pretty psyched that season 3 of The Venture Bros. returns June 1 but I'm even more psyched that there's even an official shirt club, which has a new episode-specific shirt for each of the 13 weeks of the third season. So once that week is gone, so is that week's shirt.

Shirts cost US$22 per pop (domestic shipping is included) but if you subscribe for the long haul (13 shirts for US$250, you do the math), you also get a free Brock Samson Kodokan Blood Judo t-shirt.


Subscription offer lasts until June 7, 11:59PM (EST). Shirts are printed on AA.

Funkosaur Wear

Someone had this brilliant idea for a t-shirt line, where you educate people about the Tuojianwhathellisthishitosaurus. Just pick a design and the apparel you want it to be printed on.

Also, didja know there are people out there who fantasize about sexing a dinosaur? Boy, the Internet is a cuh-razy place!

Monies: US$16.99 (Fruit of the Loom) US$18.99 (AA) US$29.99 (hoodie)

The Hell?

This looks cool but what the hell is that?

I almost soiled my panties when I first saw it.

Monies: US$30

A Good Start to the Week

Let's start this Monday off with a bang shall we?


Grace, who handles promotion from Eio Clothing, likes to taunt me with their cool sexy parties (see above) knowing full well that I can never set foot on England soil because of my unfathomable hatred for the Spice Girls.

Oh, yeah and Eio Clothing also have their new Spring / Summer lineup like the sexy number above that's good to wear at cool sexy parties.

Monies: £29.95 or US$60

The dudes at The Ryde are organizing a design t-shirt competition to raise money and awareness for breast cancer prevention. If you hate cancer but absolutely love the breasts, this will be perfect for you.

Daryll from Indivisual Clothing gives a heads up about a new polo shirt designed by Daniel Vigil. Geometric shapes, mysterious letterings... there's a lot going on on the shirt.

Monies: US$58

You've seen them before but they're worth mentioning again. Amanda, from Reverie, likes "dressing the dreamers," so how does she know this is what I dreamt of last week?

Monies: US$19

Bang Bang T-Shirts released three new t-shirts and I like this shirt because I think today's cinema is poorer without the rich stereotypical kung-fu revenge flick.

Not to nit-pick but Bang Bang call this their Ninja T-Shirt, which is disparate from Shaolin kung fu. I'm just saying.

Monies: £13.99 or US$28

If you mofos have anything you want to make known, feel free to shoot us an e-mail.

Except, you, Carl. Please stop stuffing our inbox with pictures of your wiener. It wasn't funny during the first seven times.

The Rule of the Best

What I like about Thriving Ink is the collaboration with other artists. I especially like this one called The Aristocrat not only because of it's stunning commentary about the horrors of war but also because it reminds me of a dirty joke.

And a dirty joke is always welcomed in times of bullets and bloodshed.

Monies: US$19.95

What I Got - Off the Ledge Tees

I received a package from Off the Ledge Tees. Let's see what we have.

It seem like a trend for t-shirt companies to send their shirts in a ziplock. I know it's not to keep the freshness in. I'm just bemused by this method of packaging.

It says "FREE YOUR INNER MONKEY." This can be taken wrongly. Yes, that's the monkey from Monkeys in a Barrel. The shirt is printed on an AA ringer.


Now this is pretty clever. It took me a while to actually discern this. Probably best if you weren't drinking yourself when you're looking at it.

I like Weezer. I thought the Blue Album was the best thing since bread was sliced. I wasn't crazy about their second album. Did. Not. Like Pinkerton. When I first listened to it, I thought my ears were being raped by demon noises.

But on later repeats, it grew on me. I like Pinkerton. This is the same with Off the Ledge Tees.

The folks behind Off the Ledge Tees never claim they were doing it for critical acclaim. They designed these shirts because it just struck them. They won't win any major award for their art and some might not even make a lick of sense but they are interesting to wear. Take Chainsaws...

It's off-beat and it works in tandem with the image.

They said on their site, "you may not like most of what we have, but there might just be that one shirt that strikes a chord with you."

Indeed.

Synchronicty

Print Liberation is a design studio in Philadelphia. With regards to their glow-in-the-dark vampire teeth t-shirt, the Obama t-shirts and the Positive Tess, the ABE/JFK connection hoodie appeals to the conspiracy nut in me.

Monies: US$48

What I Got - Bite Mark Clothing

Elaine Blakely from Bite Mark Clothing, which specializes in zombie chic wear, sent over her work for scrutiny. Let's see how it holds up.


First off, you know you're in for a treat when the package it comes in looks like this.


Blakely calls it a "body bag" - a black envelope and honest-to-gosh stamps of the Queen. A quick flip over...


... and you get a sense of the effort gone into designing the exterior (how did this ever got through customs, I would never know.)


Notice the blood smears? Those are Blakely's own fingers.


Every Bite Mark Clothing package is unique, a snowflake.

I should delve into Blakely's working habit and environment.


This is where she works the size of the room. It's a one-woman operation. She does the designs, the packaging, the postage, the marketing...

She even does her own screenprinting, something which she had to learn from scratch. She details her process from designing to screenprinting and just reading it made me tired. It's laborious.

Back to the package.


Here are the contents: an ominous red packet and a nice letter from Blakely telling me to produce a prompt review or she'll stretch out my foreskin and make me wear it like a little hat. While I file the letter away for my lawyers, let's take a look at the red packet.

Here's a closeup.

As I peeled open the packet. The inside spilled forth like a ritualistic disemboweling. This is a very rare instance where I thoroughly enjoy the process of unwrapping something. It's very amusing to me.


Here's a closeup of the promo card (very catchy slogan)...


... and the back of it.


I think this is a sticker.


I was expecting a t-shirt with a zombie muttering "braaains" or something but this is is a nice surprise. No undead. It's just the city under a sinister full moon.


A city scene in the night should invoke a sense of midnight tranquility...


... yet Blakely manages to instill a certain dread in it. Well-done! Gives a whole new turn to the term, "moon-face."

Just as you think that this is as good as it gets, there's one more surprise. At the back of the t-shirt...


... holy jumping Moses! What is that? It's a shirt tag! On the outside! There are even instructions on how to wash and care for your t-shirt. The kick-ass part of this is that...


... the tag is sewn on by hand. That's right, good readers, Elaine Blakely sews the tags at the back of each and every damn t-shirts by hand!

Which would explain the pic of the bloody fingers.

I love shit like this! The whole, D-I-Y operation in making a t-shirt, you can really see the work Blakely put into her lineup and package. Judging by the current design, Blakely knows what she's doing and she's always honing her skills.

Designs aside, remember, she does everything herself and that alone should count for something. I'm a big proponent for small companies that offer that personal touch big companies seem to lack. If Blakely continues her current work ethic, I envisioned we'll be seeing more of her stuff in the long run.

6 Degrees

We haven't posted anything from No Star because there are other sites, which featured them rather tastefully but when I saw this...


... I just had to post this.

This is rather witty, no?

Monies: US$24

J-Horror

AkumuInk came up with this horrific image of my parasitic twin in my chest, gasping in horror at the outside world she's been missing out.


And this t-shirt where I always see my phallus as a three-headed hydra.

It's like they are seeing into my brain!

Monies: US$21

Note: Is the guy above posing in a men's room? That's gotta be a first.

Post-VD

It's the day after VD. Here's more dissent from the lovelorn.

Monies: US$18

NSAD

Today's for lovers but what about the loners?

If you're single, why not proclaim your status with this t-shirt from Storyville. That's right, you can tell Hallmark to shove their overly-priced VD cards up their buttocks!

Also, if you study at UT, you can easily pick up the t-shirt from their store at 2001 Guadalupe.

Monies: US$20

Button Up

I like my t-shirts and I like my buttons but I have issues when it comes to affixing my buttons on my favorite apparel. Sometimes the buttons leave unslightly holes, which cause some people to think pint-sized moths are on the attack.

Lucky Threadz combines my two favorite things to make one highly favored item.

Monies: US$16